Humanitarian Work Made Angelina Jolie Cry

Angelina Jolie claims that she was often tearful and felt overwhelmed during her work as a humanitarian ambassador for the United Nations. Said Jolie,

“I couldn’t really talk about the situation without being emotional. And I went through a period of just complete lack of hope when I couldn’t find another child to add to my homemade Skittles rainbow.”

Nigerians Free Three Hostages

Nigerian forces released three European hostages Monday, according to officials. In order to secure the release of the hostages, UN officials have reportedly agreed to help the Nigerians transfer 20 million ‘united states bills’ belonging to unknown deposed ruler Mbutu Nudu out of the country.

Knicks Give GM Multiyear Extension

The New York Knicks have given GM Isiah Thomas a multiyear contract extension Monday, despite what some call extremely poor management on his part. “I believe we have clearly seen significant and evident progress,” said MSG chairman James Dolan, after watching his team go 29-34 so far this season. In related news, FEMA has dispatched crisis management and disaster relief teams to the New York metropolitan area.