Michael Jackson To Build Giant Robot In Vegas

Pop star Michael Jackson is in talks to build a 50-foot robotic replica of himself to roam the Las Vegas desert. Engineers are said to have drawn up plans for a mobile security perimeter around the robot to protect onlookers should the robot’s nose accidentally fall off. According to reports, the only issue holding back the project at the present time is the monumental cost involved in supplying the robot with a large enough umbrella to shield it from the sun.

Hamm, Garciaparra Welcome Twins

Soccer star Mia Hamm and second baseman Nomar Garciaparra welcomed twin girls Wednesday, according to sources. Garciaparra was said to be overcome with emotion during the delivery and subsequently suffered a sprained wrist while cutting the second baby’s umbilical cord.