New Scientology Centers Opening In Florida

Today’s opening ceremonies of Church of Scientology outreach centers in Plant City and downtown St. Petersburg are expected to feature music, carnival games like ‘Whac-A-Thetan’ and an appearance by John Travolta. Admission to the site is free but guests are required to donate their life savings before leaving.

Lucas Schedules Star Wars Marathon

It was reported today that George Lucas plans to celebrate the 30th anniversary of the Star Wars franchise with a 17-hour movie marathon during which all six Star Wars movies will be shown back to back. Audiences are expected to arrive around the 8-hour mark.

Bush Adviser: Democrats’ Iraq Plans Will Lead To Failure

National Security Adviser Stephen Hadley claimed on Sunday that House Democrats will assure failure in Iraq with their plans to remove troops, as opposed to the resounding success of operations thus far.